It's been a year since I've posted and believe me when I tell you, it has been one hell of a year.
I won't lie, 2023 almost broke me. It was a difficult and heartbreaking time, and led to a complete upheaval of our entire lives in what felt like no time at all. I don't need to go into details for, well, reasons; it still is having its repercussions now that I am still dealing with and struggling with and for that, it led to 2024 being the year that tested me beyond belief.
2024 has honestly been both one of the worst and best times for me. There has been more than one occasion where I have wanted to give up, and if it wasn't for some of the people around me I probably would have. It was a year of endings, of upset and difficult losses. It was a year of new beginnings, of finding my feet again, of remembering my worth. It opened doors to new experiences, taught me new skills, introduced me to some very wonderful people.
2024 gave me a chance to reconnect with Tomas and Morena. Tomas is now a full fledged teenager whilst Morena is choosing to act like one ('I don't have a boyfriend mummy.... we split up') and trying to be both mum and dad rolled into one at these moments in their lives is challenging to say the least. Both are fiercely independent and I only pray that they remember that I am always there for them no matter what and that their father would always be so so proud of them.
2024 allowed us the oppurtunity to come back to Argentina and see family that we havent seen in years, that Tomas and Morena havent met before even.... I'm typing this listening to a house full of love and laughter preparing for tonights festivities- Christmas is celebrated on the 24th here- and am reminded how lucky we are to have this network of family and friends that love us and welcome us each time we are here in this beautiful, crazy and incredible country. I was lucky enough to again get a ticket for the Final of the Open at Palermo and being able to see that level of polo played in the cathedral of polo is something that will never stop being magical, and being able to do that with the support that I have here is truly appreciated.
2024 saw some people leave my life; some for reasons unknown and for those I wish them well. Some left for their own demons that I can no longer tolerate. You know who you are, and when you come back looking for the friendship you need, it won't be here anymore- you hurt me and you taught me what I don't deserve. Thank you.
It also saw some people come into my life; some briefly, some are still here, and all of them were incredible people who made things shine that bit brighter. It saw me meet someone who reminded me how friendship and love shoud be simple and easy, trusting and valued. This person remembered my favourite sweets and bought them for me on a day where they knew I would be struggling- a simple gesture that let me know how important I was to them, and is the reason that they hold a special place in my heart.
2024, there is so much I could say but it wouldn't even begin to explain the profound effect on my life you have had. Not always good, but not all bad. I went into 2024 tired of hearing how strong I was, exhausted from fighting for so long and just wanting to not feel like I was drowning- strong because there is no other choice but just not wanting to be.
2024 reminded me that my strength isn't just because I have no choice. It's my ability to get up and keep going, to do the right thing and keep moving forward even when you get pushed back- because strength isn't in being perfect, it's in continuing to try and learning from our mistakes. My strength is in my ability to smile on bad days, to laugh off the ridiculous and marvel in the simple things. It's my ability to be fluid and go with the flow, to just wing it and manage to get everything done that's needed. My strength is in those friends that are there for me lifting me up when I feel low, it's in my ability to care for people and be kind even to those who don't deserve my kindness.
So thank you 2024, please don't come back for a repeat performance. And please, have a word with 2025- more wealth, health and love for all those that need it.
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